Friday, September 26, 2014

I can't....I'm not smart enough.

When does it become ok to say "I can't....?"  At what age is that an acceptable excuse?  That is exactly what it excuse.

A good parent tells their kids "of course, you can." for so many things.  We teach kids to dream big.  Then as an adult we get in a box and stay there.  We don't fight the status quo (and if we do we are wierd!)

As a side note - When I hear a parent saying "oh, s/he can't _______________." about their child it infuriates me.  Of course, s/he can try martial arts, drive a car, play soccer, do that math, or fill in the blank.  It is important that our kids understand that they may not be the best martial artist, baseball/basketball/football/soccer player but that they can for sure DO it.  But that is a different blog post for a different day. So I'm going back to my original thought today.

I have heard adults say "I can't homeschool" several times in the last few weeks.  I get that there are situations and life that makes homeschooling not possible.  Single parents households is one that comes to mind (although I know single parent homeschoolers).  Some would say financial reasons are a problem.  That is a harder one....could it be a lifestyle issue instead?  (I am not placing judgement if homeschooling is not for you....or not for you at this stage of your life) But the reason I've heard recently is that "I'm not smart enough." or "With my personality, I don't think it will work.  We will just butt heads"


When does that become an acceptable thing to say about yourself?  When does that become a viable reason....


When your child comes home with miserable math homework does she get to say "I'm not smart enough for this work." and you say "Oh right.  You are not smart enough"

Or what about an F on a science test?  Can he look at you and say "I'm not smart enough to take a science test" and be off the hook.

Can your high school student say "I'm not smart enough to get a job and stay in school" and you pay all his bills while he floats through.

Or can she say "mom I'm not smart enough to go to college." and you said "oh that's true. You aren't good enough for college"

What about when you get called to the principal's office AGAIN because he got in a fight over lunch and punched a kid.  Does he get to say "Mom, its my personality.  I just butt heads with Johnny."

What about when she loses another job because she smarts off to the boss.  Does she get to blame her personality? and move in to your basement?

What about when he gets into an argument with his wife?  Can he say "our personalities are clashing"

I'm making an assumption that all of the answer to these questions is no.  I am not saying it is wrong to pay all your kids bills thru highschool (it won't happen in this house but do what you want).  College may not be a path your child chooses....also ok.  A fight with another child might happen (one of mine bloodied a friend's nose once).  My point is the excuse that "I'm not smart enough" or "I have a __________ personality" is invalid.  

If it isn't a good enough excuse for your kids to get out of what you know they need to do or to get out of trouble you know they caused....then it isn't good enough for an adult.  I am not saying that everyone should homeschool...I am, however, saying that if you are feeling led in that direction and are fighting that feeling....find a better excuse than your brains or your personality.  Cause anyone who has homeschooled for any length of time knows it is a poor excuse and we aren't buying it.  

So I'll end by saying what any good parent would say to their child who thinks they aren't smart enough or their personality is all wrong.  Honey, you CAN do anything you put your mind to.  If God calls you to do something, he also equips you for it in one way or another.  And personalities are something we will live with our whole lives.  We have to learn to use our personality for the best always.  We can either fight it or learn to use it, may as well learn to work with the one God gave you.  We won't always get along with everyone all the time....but we can always get along with someone most of the time.  And lastly....all choices come with sacrifices.  We have to decide which things are worth sacrificing and which aren't....or ways to find the balance.  

But we are smart enough and God gave us the perfect personality to do whatever He calls us to do and don't use that excuse on me anymore, young man/lady.  ;)  

***If you have questions about homeschooling in general or how we do it....ask.  Any homeschooler you know will likely talk your ear off (myself included).*****

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